Our First Camp
“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
- Ephesians 2:10
During intern training, God put this verse on my heart as a reminder for me to carry into the summer and it has been one that I have needed continually.
My transition to Estonia has been more challenging than I expected. I have struggled with adjusting to the culture and dealing with the language barrier. I have spent afternoons wandering around the grocery store and google translating all the signs. I have been attempting to navigate public transportation and I have been adjusting to the general quietness of the culture. Although I have traveled a decent bit, this trip has been more out of my comfort zone than I expected.
Also, since the rest of my team is guys, I am living in a dorm-style building while they live in an apartment which has given me more autonomy. The independence has been challenging for me. On my previous trips, everything has been done as a group from grocery shopping to cooking to sharing a living space. I have quickly realized how much I value sharing space with people I know and feel safe around. So God has been teaching me a lot about how to use the times of solitude and silence that He has given me well and teaching me that He is my safe place, my refuge, my friend.
We finished intern training on June 8th and then made our two-day road trip up to Tallinn which will be our home base for the summer. Then our final teammate, Garry, finally got his passport and arrived in Estonia on June 12th. I have been encouraged by the way God put together our team. I have seen His sovereignty in the uniqueness of each of the interns and how we complement each other. The weeks leading up to camp consisted of meetings but also downtime, which allowed our team to build relationships with each other and allowed me to prepare my heart. I am thankful for the time that I got to spend in prayer and in the Word.
Our first short-term team arrived on June 23rd. The team is a young adult group from Chino Valley, California. We had dinner with them that night and then the next day we had a training day with them where we discussed Josiah Venture’s vision, cultural differences, sharing testimonies, and the gospel. I had the chance to share a talk on the five challenges of Christ which discusses discipleship and how to meet people where they are and invite them into a deeper relationship with God. The training provided an opportunity to get to know the team and also share our hearts for the camp.
The camp started on Sunday afternoon and each day of camp had a similar schedule. We would start the day with a leader meeting in the morning where one of us interns would share a devotional and we would review the schedule for the day. Then we had breakfast and our morning coach room. The coach room involved hot seat, worship, and a message. During the morning coach rooms, someone from the short-term team would share a devotional and their testimony. Afterward, we would meet with our small groups before heading to morning training which involved soccer drills and scrimmage games. After morning training, we had lunch, an afternoon activity (swimming, disc golf, beach soccer), and another training session. Then we had dinner and another coach room where the full-time staff would speak. The theme of camp this year is part of the plan. So the talks walked through the unreliableness of our plans and then God’s plan for us by discussing sin, Jesus, and the Church.
Highlights: A highlight of my week was getting to know Laura and Merita and seeing how God was working in their lives. Laura is such a light for Christ. She was continually encouraging others and always seeking to include the other girls in our discussions and activities. She also asked meaningful questions about God and also about my faith. I was encouraged by her desire to serve the Lord and surrender to His plan for her life even when it required patience. Seeing God working in her life encouraged me that God is moving in Estonia and that there are young people here who are passionate about God and will transform their communities through the gospel.
Merita was also a blessing to me. On Wednesday night, we did a Labyrinth with the kids which was a reflective prayer walk and at the end, the kids had the chance to talk with their small group leader one-on-one. During this time, I got to talk to Merita and she shared things she had been thinking about throughout the week and questions/doubts she had about God. While we had good conversations during the week, this was the most vulnerable conversation and it was amazing to see how God had been working through conversations, coach rooms, and even the hot seat to bring things up in her heart and mind. I got to speak truth over the lies she shared with me and also pray over her.
Challenges: Although God was clearly moving and speaking this week, I struggled a lot. I struggled with insecurity and doubt. Since I arrived in Estonia, I feel like the enemy has been attacking my identity and purpose. I have regularly felt that I am the wrong person to be here or that I lack gifts that would be helpful. All these thoughts and fears were highlighted this week. I walked into the week having placed a heavy burden on myself. I carried a self-applied pressure to connect well with all the girls and to always have the right questions to ask.
In a lot of ways, I walked into the week desperate to be used by God and yet attempting to rely on myself. Even though I knew God was with me, I did not feel like God was with me. Therefore, any perceived inadequacy, any awkward conversation, or any disengagement during a small group, felt like an affirmation that I was doing it alone or that I was the wrong person to be there. Yet, we serve a God who is so patient with us and faithful to His promises even in our seasons of doubt. No amount of insecurity can change the good works that God has in store and even my doubts do not change the reality of God’s presence.
During the Labyrinth, I had a conversation with one of the girls that felt like hitting a brick wall. Every question was met with, “I don’t know” or a one-word response. The conversation left me discouraged, questioning why I was there and where God was. Then Laura came out. As we were talking, she made a comment about how she could feel God with us and see that He was working. Then she told me how amazing it was that God brought me to serve at camp. She said that it could have been anyone and He specifically chose me. I was humbled by her faith and thankful God used her to minister to me even as I was trying to pour into her and others. She was right! God was with us and working. Three kids accepted Christ and many more heard the gospel.
God is working in Estonia! I have seen Him working in the youth, the full-time staff, the interns, and the church here. We serve a God who is continually at work and has a plan that He has invited us into despite our weaknesses and doubts. Praise God that His power is made perfect in our weakness.
Prayer Requests:
Pray for the local leaders as they seek to follow up with the kids from the camp and disciple those who committed their lives to Christ
Pray for unity on our intern team and the continued deepening of those relationships
Pray that God would give me confidence in Him despite the lies of the enemy and that He would help me to depend on Him and trust in Him
Pray for our upcoming camps. We have an English camp, music camp, and disc golf camp all starting on Sunday, and then another English camp starting on July 23rd. Pray for the kids coming, the local leaders, our intern team, and the short-term teams coming to serve.
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| We got to meet with Jael who will be helping lead the English camp |
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| We had breakfast with the JV staff and their families which involved a game of fishbowl |
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| Hot seat: the kids got five minutes to ask any anything they wanted. "What is your biggest fear" and "Messi or Ronaldo" were the top questions. |
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| Two of the girls from my small group |
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